Pay Tv

Sydney Morning Herald

Monday February 25, 2008

Michael Idato

Rocky

(1976) Fox Classics, 8.30pm

Not long after Sylvester Stallone made what was technically his film debut in the somewhat forgettable Party At Kitty And Stud's, a pornographic film so awful it barely deserves acknowledgement, the man who would later become Rambo was Rocky Balboa, the lead in a $US1.2 million ($1.3 million) feature film that would go on to gross hundreds of millions for its studio.

Balboa is a schmuck from the outer suburbs of Philadelphia who makes spare money by club fighting. He gets a shot at the big time, resulting in a lot of jogging, an inordinate amount of sweating and some grunting, which, in hindsight, seems to be film dialogue. It didn't stop there: Rocky was followed by Rocky II, III, IV, V and, most recently, Rocky Balboa.

Dr Phil

W, 4.20pm

Perhaps the only thing more ghastly about American culture than kiddie beauty pageants - the subject of today's chat on Dr Phil - is Dr Phil himself, a sort of self-styled healer for the masses, fuelled by the machinery that keeps Empire Oprah going.

His morality is sound (who wants to endorse America's baby beauty circuit, where children are painted up as adults - and not the nice kind, either - and paraded about for a fawning audience?) but he falls down in his delivery. His recent mercy mission to save Britney Spears exploded in a mess of what looked like self-publicity and his holier-than-thou tone rings a little hollow. Television needs something with more dimension and Dr Phil sells a little flat.

Tidal Wave - No Escape

(1997) Hallmark, 10.15pm

Question: What is more fun than a $1 billion disaster movie with a gripping script? Answer: A disaster movie with a shoestring budget and a script that makes horsey doo-doo look like Shakespeare.

This is an absolute shocker and for that reason it's riveting from start to finish. It stars everyone who was available (as opposed to everyone they undoubtedly wanted), the best known of which are Corbin Bernsen (LA Law's Arnie Becker), who plays the tough guy heading an investigation into a series of brutal tidal waves, and Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs, who is best known for playing "Boom Boom" Washington in Welcome Back, Kotter.

Reno 911!

Comedy Channel, 9pm

This is one of pay TV's gems, a mockumentary about the police force in Nevada's gambling oasis, Reno, which includes the very gay Jim Dangle (Thomas Lennon). There are some genuinely inspired moments, most of them thanks to Lennon's willingness to be the butt of the joke.